Day 21

Today's favor was about true love. I received a request from a new friend asking me to help him evaluate his career goals and aspirations through some life coaching exercises. He recalled from one of our previous conversations, that prior to teaching Pilates, I led small groups in my home and saw clients privately as a life coach.

We met at a coffee shop in Los Angeles and were fortunate to have a large section of the outdoor patio available to only us. Our conversation began with us exchanging the usual pleasantries and with me asking him what he hoped to accomplish during our session. He paused for a moment and then said, "Actually, what I really want to talk about is my reaction to something you said in a past conversation. It really made me think."

Puzzled, I scanned my memories of conversations past and replayed my words as best as possible, yet unable to glom onto any one particular statement of note. Finally, after several moments that seemed like an eternity, I responded, "What did I say?" He sat up tall in his chair and then leaned into the table slightly with rounded shoulders and uttered the following in a low voice, "I asked you why you were single since you seem like such an amazing woman and you said it was because you needed to learn how to love yourself completely before you could give a man unconditional love and that you were open to that now but not in a hurry to have it."

Taking a careful sip of his steaming coffee, he remained silent for a moment and then continued, "I thought that was so brave of you to say to me, so refreshing to hear something other than the usual canned LA-girl response of 'I'm picky or I won't settle.' You don't know me that well and yet you said those words with confidence and sureness. It really made me think about my life and that I need to learn that too: I need to learn how to love myself fully before I can have a serious relationship again. I guess what I really want to accomplish today is to say thank you."

Beyond stunned, I searched for the words to form a response, but found none. Instead, a gentle laughter filled the air and I at last said, "Wow, that was the last thing I expected to hear during our session today. I'm touched that what I said meant so much to you and happy it was helpful. You are very welcome."

It seems the only constant in life is that it is never constant. It continuously changes in unexpected ways. It is our choice to see these unexpected occurrences as deterrents from our pre-set agendas or as a gift to help us look at something or someone in a slightly different way without a sense of loss of purpose or destination. Each favor shares in common the fact that the real meaning or purpose is not evident upon a superficial inspection; it is only through reflection and introspection its true essence reveals itself to me. Thank you to all of you for helping me to continue on this journey to see what really is and not what I perceive it to be.